February 5, 2013 § 7 Comments
NEED A NEW NEMESIS.
Iron makes Steel Stronger.
And my previous nemesis has become soft. He started watching the ENTIRE ‘Gilmore Girls’ Series and writing each episode’s synopsis on his Facebook. I feel as if I am re-watching Gilmore Girls. And I LOVE Gilmore Girls! Lorelai and Rory are SOOO Cute!
In any event, I am in need of a NEW, more badass, NEMESIS.
Must be able to compete with me in areas of strength, speed, stamina.
Qualities inducing jealousy and/or mutual hatred are appreciated.
Activities include fighting, fighting over the same woman, fierce debate (political/sports/religion).
My fighting style is mixed boxing/martial arts (diligent student of the style of Chuck Norris).
I like all types of women, but especially tall, blue eyes, heart of gold.
My political views: Libertarian
My religious views: Athiest
My sports teams: TEXAS RANGERS, TEXAS Longhorns, Dallas Cowboys
A polar opposite Nemesis would be preferred, but all applications will be considered.
Positions available: One. (There can be only one.)
Pay: Not applicable. Money won via wagers during Nemesis fights should be kept on the DL for tax purposes.
Please no terrorists. While passion and fearlessness are desired qualities, my nemesis must know that at the end of the day, I am glad that my nemesis is there.
Thank you for viewing this post and email me your qualifications. I look forward to reading them.
*British and French will be given first priority.
**Must be willing to sign forms of non-disclosure, liability releases, and any other documents absolving me of any responsibility.